At the writing of this chapter, I was recalled to what Jonathan had expressed to me about empathizing with Michael's feelings in carrying out the consummation, and his desire to personally alleviate as much of Michael's agony as he could, when he visited Michael to gift me to Him. I asked him if he could express his remembrances of those feelings he felt for Messiah. Jonathan wrote to me:
It came back to me this morning, nearly two years after the fact, what was involved in my thinking at the time I had been prompted to speak with Michael regarding the consummation, and more specifically, your involvement in it. Having known Wayne for the past twelve years, I had gained a knowledge of his character from personal experience. I had an innate sense of how he, personally, would relate himself to the instructions which Father was revealing regarding the physical consummation. I sensed the intensity of revulsion at the thought of desecrating sacred honor, violating sacred trusts, and compromising relationships which had developed over long periods of time.
From the beginning I had the clear, definitive knowing this was not merely a human idea or undertaking. I had an unqualified certainty that it was from Father. I knew that "the flesh" had NO PART in this whatsoever; that thoughts of romance, personal desire, or human passion were entirely absent from this calling. I knew that he was not "in it" for personal pleasure or gratification, and that there was nothing "casual" involved in this relationship. It was not a sexual encounter, but a sacrifice, to which he was being called.
In consideration of all of this, how must he feel? I knew what I was feeling, and it did not "feel" like the Sea of Glass - smooth, serene, and placid. The position in which he had been placed was a much more trying place than I occupied.
It must have seemed to him a great compromise, and I felt for him, and wanted him to be entirely free of obstructing, conflicting thoughts or feelings which would hinder Him from freely following Father's plan.
These were the thoughts and feelings which Father brought to me, prompting my visit with Michael the day I gave you to Him. Jonathan
The next day, October 2, 2000, Israel (Salem) the previous husband of the other Witness, found himself at Michael's giving his former wife to Messiah, for the consummation that the Father had planned for His Son.
When asked what made him go over to Michael's on October 2, to give his wife to Michael for the divine consummation, Salem replied:
I was coming pretty often to see Michael then, and it wasn't just that day that I had gone to Michael's for this purpose. I had tried to do that three or four times before. This was just one more time. It all tied together. My feelings were still trying to give up my wife. What I was giving her up to, was the consummation. I thought I had given her up before, and then my feelings would come back. That's what I based my whole life on, my feelings and emotions. Even as I was giving her up, I was already feeling like I was still clinging. My participation wasn't a forced thing. Its like Father was saying, "This is what you're going to do now," and there's all this Power that's telling you this, and its like arguing with a 6000 ton rock. The rock is going to win. You're not going to push it. I was being propelled to do everything Father wanted me to do, and go past my feelings and emotions to do what He had put on my heart to do, not even realizing at the time that He was putting it on my heart.
Salem also shared a few of his journal entries for a few days before and after October 2, which will help the reader to grasp the Father's awesome power, to bring about His divine will through this human vessel, in spite of the intense and overwhelming protest of his emotions.
9/28 — Talked to the Shepherd again this morning. It was so good, so good. I was so blessed. One thing He said was that He had been so distressed by what is going on with me, because He feels me and what I'm having to deal with. He said His heart goes out to me when He sees me walking across the field all alone. His heart cries for me. I can only thank Him from the bottom of my heart, my broken heart.
9/30 — This morning I am very full of the Lord. My cup is overflowing with His love and mercy, goodness and grace to me. I have such a deep sense of His loving Presence in my soul. Such a powerful Presence inside of me. "And it shall be at that day, saith the Lord, that thou shalt call me Ishi (my Husband)" Hosea 2:16. "Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time." 1 Peter 5:6. I just talked to my dear friend Gratitude (Anaiah Michal). She encouraged me so much. I love her dearly. She is a gift from Father to us here.
The Shepherd unloaded today that the marriage of the Lamb would have to be physically consummated. He didn't give many details but I saw it would include Deb, my dearest Deb. Father must give me victory and submission in this, because I can't do it, that's for sure! Much time in prayer! Slept about an hour last night. Had a horrible dream and couldn't go back to sleep.
10/1 Sunday — Talked to the Shepherd early. Got Him out of bed. He said I still hadn't given up Deb. That wasn't good news, but I knew I was only fooling myself. I submit again Father, I'm sorry for my unbelief. My daughter told me I need to give up, give Mom up, or anything up. I can do nothing. Yes, Lord, Amen.
We had a short powerful meeting today after potluck, (the meeting when Father said it again.). The Shepherd asked us if we would still trust Him after He took our most precious gift.
I raised my hand and said, "Yes."
He said, "I can see you would."
I felt like I was converted again. After the meeting I went to hug Michael. He really hugged me, then kissed my forehead and said, "It keeps getting brighter and brighter." I kissed Him on the lips and surprised Him. He said again, "And brighter and brighter." I made a final, FINAL DECISION. I will trust Him. I will trust Father, no matter what it looks, feels or tastes like. He will keep me!
10/2 — I had a good day in the Spirit. Had strong feelings and emotions, but I know they were a lie and they had no power over me.
10/5 — Woke up at 3:30. The Spirit put the prayer in my mouth, "Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me, (a constant Spirit)." I have to have this to do what He is asking of me. I can't possibly do it without Him. Here I am, Lord, take my old heart, my selfish, hateful heart, and give me Yours. "My flesh and my heart faileth, [that's why I need a new one], but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion forever." My need keeps getting bigger. I need a savior, I'm lost. I'm so tired of the pain and agony. Maybe I'm sick enough of being sick, to stop it. Giving up is hard, but that is translation. It's all by faith like Gratitude has been telling me. We don't do it. Father keeps us. He puts the prayers in my mouth. I know He does. He causes me to seek Him. It's not something I am doing, it's everything that He is doing. Father started it and He will finish it — and finish ME!! Michael has been so good and kind and patient with me. So full of faith and longsuffering. I love Him and I know that He loves me.
At the writing of this chapter, now two years after these journal entries, Salem shares his current perspective:
Looking back, everything that happened here was to bring me out of myself (self bondage). It all seemed, or seems, so unreal. I know for sure that it was all the Father's plan. Only He could propel me along the path He laid out. He gave me a sense that it was all going to turn out right, if I could just look at it from His perspective. Our flesh can't see. We are blind in our feelings and emotions. Even when I was lower than I ever thought I could go, I know He was still with me. I never stopped and thanked Him for coming up with such a great idea (consummation), but I always knew in my Spirit that it was perfect, perfect, perfect. Father made everything happen at the right time, and He was even able to use me to do it. The miracle of this is like nothing compared to me being able to walk on water; that would be such a little thing, compared to this miracle — that Father was able to use somebody like me to cooperate with His purposes. Father has given me this verse over and over these last few months. "Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his WIFE for his Friend (Michael, the Son of God)." John 15:13.
Recently while on a walk, Father sat me down on a rock and gave me the following poem to express what He has done in the land.
TO THE BRIDE
She was called by our Father in heaven,
The bride she was anointed to be
Her life was all for this moment
And now He's given her eyes to see.
Her time in the earth is over
Heaven has given her Michael, her True Husband to be.And Father looked down and said:
Michael needs a witness
A wife in His marriage to Me.
All will marvel at the connection,
Connected, but incredibly free.
She will be for the earth a token
of what My Son is to Me.Michael's bride is arrayed in His beauty
A pure garment of light from above,
See it beam through her radiant eyes
Eyes that shine with Her Father's love,
When she severed her earthly connections
Her prison doors flew open and now she's really free.And Father looked down and said:
Michael needs a witness
A wife in His marriage to Me.
All will marvel at the connection
Connected, but incredibly free
She will be for the earth a token
Of what My Son is to Me.She even left her earthly companion
I know, because I was that man.
Now they call me “the previous husband”
— a former lover, a symbol in the land.
And it's been a long painful road
But all heaven came down and spoke this to me,Father said to me: My Son
Michael needs a man to witness
A wife in His marriage to Me.
All will marvel at the connection
Connected but completely free.
You will be for the earth a token
Of what My Son is to Me.Now you might start to wonder
What does all this mean to me?
I tell you the truth: Michael wants you
Just like He has her and me
If you lay down, be quiet and listenYou can hear Father say: My Son
Needs a People to witness
A wife in His marriage to Me
All will marvel at the connection
Connected but incredibly free. My people
Shall be for the earth a token
Of what My Son is to Me.Come away with Me, My beloved,
Just lay down your life and have Me.
I know in the sky you expected
The Lord in glittering display to see
But just know that I am a lot closer
Than whatever you've dreamed about Me.
Cross over and lay here with Me
Be quiet and lay down beside Me.And Michael says: Oh
Earth, here is your witness
The only one you'll ever see.
You've reasoned away My second coming
Your heart is fixed, it is finished; you can't even hear Me.And Father looks down and says:
Michael now has a Witness
A wife in His marriage to Me.
All will marvel at the connection
Connected but so perfectly free —
She shines forth to the earth as a token
Of what My Son is to Me. SalemMichael shared with me long ago, that someday I would be happy and satisfied with what the Lord has brought me through. He said that I would be thankful and say, "Thank You Daddy, thank You, thank You so much!" This week as I was strongly drawn out to walk, Daddy and I had that conversation. He filled me to the overflowing with gratitude, for the walk through the valley (of the shadow of death). One of the things that led up to this, was observing people in their every day, earthly lives, going nowhere but around and around. It seemed to me that I was looking at it from the other side now, from the Father's perspective.
In my mind's eye, I can see two people, one is on his face in front of the furnace, saying something like this: Here I am Father, I am willing to step in. My hand is out to you. I can see You in there. Tell me when to step in. I want to do your will. I am weary of my life. Help me cross over, Lord. The other person is sitting in front of his computer saying something like this: Here I am God, I'm reading about what Michael did, especially the things that make me feel good. I read those things over and over (Michael reruns). I've been sitting here in my easy chair all day (actually all month, actually all year). I'm kind of tired. After I finish my milk and cookies I'll take another nap. If You have anything You want to talk about (my character, my cross, my furnace, etc.) maybe You could find a better time to bother me.
The crisis that carried me through, was required in order to put me on His side. Where Daddy lives is so different than this earth. It is such a sweet, sweet place, but I cannot describe it with words. All the words I can think of, sound like this: See Daddy run. See Daddy jump. In my heart I'm dancing with Father. I'm held tight in His arms. He is covering my face with His sweet kisses. I'm melting away. It's so good. How can I stand it another minute? Do you get what I'm saying? Just lay down and be quiet. Ask Father to bring the judgment, or the crisis, upon you. It is His will for you, and not your easy chair. Kiss yourself good-bye for the last time, and jump into God's will. Hang on tight, because it's an intense ride; but when its over, well, its over, and you're here with no words. Maybe You don't want Father in your face, singing to you and smothering you with His love and affection. Well, just lean back in your chair, and go to sleep again. It will all be over soon. Salem
Abraham rejoiced to see My day: and he saw it, and was glad. John 8:56.
Abraham saw Christ's day when he received his unexplainable instructions from Father, to take his beloved son and heir, and offer him as a sacrifice on Mt. Moriah. Not one soul will translate off of this earth without "seeing Christ's day," in their own crisis. The following experience occurred in answer to a prayer which Grace found in her heart from Father, asking to see and feel Michael's personal excruciating sacrifice for her, in going forward with the consummation. This was the beginning of her personal identification with the Son of God, where the place was made in her to "see His day."
During our Sabbath morning meeting when Michael announced to us that there would be a literal, physical consummation taking place, He said, "Ten days have been given you to understand the message given here today, regarding the consummation." Immediately the prayer of response I found in my mouth was, "Father cause me to know and understand Your heart and mind on the matter."
In the afternoon, after communion, as Gratitude (Anaiah Michal) and I were on our way home, she was sharing with me how Father had drawn her out during communion, to comprehend and appreciate in a deeper way, the price of the sacrifice that Michael was about to make, in order to be Faithful to Father. She shared the exchange she had had with Michael during communion. She shared how Father had given it to her to witness Messiah's entire process of toggling, through which He had taken His Son; the agonizing "toggling" back and forth — between evidence from Him that the consummation would be only spiritual, and then evidence from Him that it would be physical; between Father's view of the consummation and its peculiar circumstances, and the natural religious "earth" view. She knew personally the anguish He had experienced in facing a literal consummation. Michael's commitment to bring us into complete union with the Father was being sealed with His whole being.
I found the strong desire awakening in me to importune Father to cause me to personally appreciate and take into myself the sacrifice Michael was making.
That evening, I was listening to a recording of Desire of Ages regarding Gethsemane and the trial of Jesus. Upon hearing the lying accusations of the priests and rulers, a great feeling of "No!!" welled up within me. It was as if I wanted to shout into the tape, "HE'S INNOCENT!!"
I knew Father was doing an internal work in me, for though I have desired and wanted to be affected by studying Jesus' life, listening to these things had never brought forth such an internal response before. It was knowing that Jesus was innocent that made the following experience all the more effective upon me. I know that I was totally prepared and set up for this experience by the Father.
The next morning the prayer that Father put in my mouth was, "Here I am, laying my life down before You, fully conscious of Your presence." As I went for a walk I was listening again to Desire of Ages. The part that Judas played in betraying Jesus, became stronger and stronger to me. As I walked up the road I was prompted to turn off and go the back way through the valley. This was not what had been in my mind. As I got to the pond, I was prompted to stop there. As I sat down quietly, I was unexpectedly taken up in a very vivid and real vision.
It has been said that we are all actors in the play of life. And now the distinct awareness was put upon me that I was to play the part of Judas - here, right now - in this little valley. It was so real I felt a chill come over me. The longer I waited in suspense the more intense the reality of it became. The feelings and words came to me that I could not do this, and would not do it. I told the Father, Don't make me do this.
In response to my request, I was asked by Father, Will you play the part I AM asking you to play?
By this time I was crying and feeling the weight of such a circumstance. I saw and felt the full reality of the cost. I would lose everything that is dear to my heart if I played this part. I would lose my best friend, Michael, and being able to love and be close to Him. I had always been drawn to the anointing of Jesus by Mary with the oil she brought with her, and it would mean giving up playing the part of Mary, who recognized the Son of God for Who He was and showered Him with the affections so due Him. I would lose all my close friends and associations that are dear, and Gratitude (Anaiah Michal) would move out of my house. My heart would remain hard and unmoveable. The traits of character that have so long plagued me would come back and my deliverance would be ended. And the world would hate me. Even they hate traitors. The love of the Father and His abiding presence, His words spoken to me, would depart from me. I would lose the peace I have experienced and my salvation.
I felt the reality of this choice to the core of my being. I was in the throws of deciding whether I would yield to the Father and lose all, or not yield to Him and save my life. My heart felt the pain of it. There was no going back or forward or out of it. The thought of playing the part to go against Michael, the One to whom I am melded, broke my heart. Looking at the decision to betray Him Who has saved my life was like watching lightning split the night. And yet here I was in the very midst of it. I felt the revulsion of such a thing, and the utter desolation of having to commit such a continuing act.
Somehow, I was brought to the place where I was willing to do what the Father seemed to be asking of me. The whole vision was so sudden, unexpected and real, that my feelings were still fully engaged in the sensing of the moment. I didn't understand the purpose of the Father, nor was I completely sure how I should relate to the vision.
Returning home, I lay down on my bed, waiting quietly for the Father to make it all clear. I told Him, "Judas or not, I am still going to believe You."
After a short time, He spoke this simple yet profound sentence into me, "So identifying with His (Michael's) thoughts and feelings you are one with His very Presence."
All at once it was clear to me that this whole experience was not about being Judas, but about experiencing the throes of Messiah's thoughts and feelings in His Gethsemane as He faced His cross of consummation in this new land. It was about the Father putting me in a vivid place where I could feel and identify with the agony of decision that Michael felt as He counted the cost of following His Father's instructions. "He poured out His life unto death, and He let Himself be regarded as a criminal and be numbered with the transgressors." Isa. 53:12 Amplified.
The words that the Father had given to me the morning before were, "Follow on to know the Lord." This had been my prayer — "to know Him."
Let us know [personally find out by experience], the Lord. Let us [pursue eagerly to secure] Him, appreciate, give heed to, and cherish Him. His going forth is prepared and certain as the dawn. And He shall come unto us as the rain, as the latter [rains which mature crops] and former rain [which germinates crops] unto the earth. Hosea 6:3.
I saw that Father had personally taken me through this particular experience of special suffering and testing, which involved an uttermost surrender. He was the One Who had caused me to experience willing acceptance of death to myself, in order to follow His personal instructions to me. Hannah Hurnard says that the "process of being put to death is often a long drawn out process. It seems, however, that in the majority of cases, there does come a special crisis, some particular experience of special suffering or testing, involving an uttermost surrender. And when that point is reached, then the rising together with Christ really does begin."
Father Himself brought me to the place where I could say to Michael, "This day I have so identified with Your thoughts and feelings, that I am one with Your very Presence." Identified means "to make to be the same, to unite or combine in such a manner as to make one; to consider as the same in effect." Very Presence means "true and real" Presence, in me. Grace
The earthly husbands of the Two Witnesses had come to Michael within twenty four hours of each other, and without knowledge of what the other had been prompted to do, to release their former earthly wives for Father's purposes. This was the second specified condition in the agreement which had been contracted between the Father and His Son months before. The first condition had already been fulfilled two months earlier.
When Father had brought His will so strongly to Michael that He was to physically consummate the marriage of the lamb, as a visible picture to the whole land of what marriage to God costs, Michael had finally agreed to go forward in Father's incomprehensible purposes, if Father Himself would clearly bring certain conditions to pass. We quote Michael's own words of this agreement:
I proposed a fleece which would settle the matter in my mind. I believe the fleece was suggested by the Father Himself to my own mind. I agreed on the consummation if certain things were done. First, the very two women I was impressed would be the chosen, would have to come to me, unsolicited and with no seduction or enticement, and request an intimate relationship with me. Secondly, the husbands would have to come to me and yield up their wives for the purposes of the consummation. This would have to be done with no input from me personally, or from their wives. I told no one of these conditions. I had never even uttered them verbally in prayer. The participants were, in no way, to be encouraged or led to believe in a personal way that they should fulfill these conditions. It would have to be a spontaneous expression inspired by the Father Himself. Thirdly, the Father Himself would have to arrange for the consummation in a way that I knew it was Him. Michael, The Finished Work
There was one final prerequisite to be fulfilled in the divine preparation for the consummation. "Thirdly, the Father Himself would have to arrange for the consummation in a way that I knew it was Him." This third condition had yet to be fulfilled. Father's Messianic time line of events to occur in the new land had already begun. From the Sabbath which began the sabbatical year of rest, until the Day of Atonement, was the first 10 day segment.
Michael had wondered whether the consummation would take place during the three days and three nights that the Son of God was to spend in the heart of the earth. Those three days and three nights in the life of Jesus of Nazareth — from Gethsemane and His trials and crucifixion, through His time in the tomb — had been the darkest time during His earthly life. As Michael stood within the shadow of His Own consummation, He wondered whether they would mark His darkest time, as well. At this point, no one knew when the consummation was going to occur; and other than the personal conviction which had come to the two former husbands that it would be with their former wives, no one in the congregation knew for sure who it would be with. Michael had said clearly that if it happened with one, it was the same as though every single person had personally participated, and every heart was wrapped in the personal implications of the moment.
Michael and the Two Witnesses had all followed very specific instructions from Father leading up to the consummation, but none of us knew beforehand what the consummation was going to look like, or that the consummation would encompass a period of time. We had nothing with which to compare this incomprehensible event, no point of reference to indicate what would occur. The cross of Messiah had been a single event in time; also, in earthly marriages, the only marriage with which we had ever been familiar, the bride and groom are considered to be consummated when the groom physically enters into his bride the first time. But these things proved to be no indication of what Father had planned "for the maturity of the times, and the climax of the ages, to unify all things and head them up and consummate them in Christ (Michael), both things in heaven and things on the earth." Eph. 1:10 Amplified. One thing Michael was very clear about, and that was His knowing that His Father would be true to the agreement They had made, and He would make it clear to His Son when the consummation was to begin.
Chapter 11, page: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16
